Saturday, October 4, 2014

Obessions Coltrane

Let me tell about Coltrane
No wait
First why was everyone keeping him a secret
You all suck officially
Yea I said it
It's been a month and I've downloaded everything I can find
He's my new unicorn
I think after this I will be able to say we can't go together of you can't respect the His greatness
Too much to ask???
Nah not even close

And let's not forget to mention Alice 
Her music is strange 
Like good strange 
Eventhough honestly I need to feel strange before I turn her on 
She freaks me out a bit 
Mostly because her sound is now 
It sounds so EDM but not 
Any take a listen

Okay maybe not EDM
Yea I lied but the way the instruments some in and out
And how calculated and random they all seem
Meh I love her crazy vibe and John will always be a God

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

In too deep

I'm doing it again
Cross country affairs
I can be the least bit vulnerable
While it looks differently
Presentation is everything
Honest yet
My rouge pawn
She's natural
Me too
But she'd never know
I treat hair like an accessory
It's fun
But she'll always judge me
And I'll enjoy her fashions
Never thought dirty women existed
Until now
Stains you refuse to clean are now permanent
Kitchen is a constant hot mess
Dishwasher but dishes still remain on the counter
Maybe I'm OCD...
Nope you're dirty
Thank you
I miss talking to boys with a girl who thinks it's fun too
I shouldn't speak to strangers
What about the hot ones
They don't count
Damn Skippy
I've never felt this good in my body
It keeps me from working out regularly
Because look at these hips and thighs

Saturday, July 5, 2014

Summer Vacation

Probably haven't done summer vacation in a long while.
Happens like that when you're a grown-up

Friday, June 13, 2014

Begininng and The End

 I wrote this back in 2011 when I decided to cut ties with the boy I gave all my stuff, even though he never asked for that burden to bare.... for that I apologize. We were on-again-off-again for several years and to be honest I think the time thing is what hurt me the most (diminishing returns). This relationship was deeper than the first time I fell in love, although I may have been the only one in love (oh well). Actually it is now what I consider my first love (with all it's imperfections and unhealthy behaviors too). I figured I'd post this because reading back at this "draft" (it was complete) showed me how much I grew in 3 year.... and how much we all grow. 
Something simple, will you come with me to Copeland's on cobb? and is the number still 555-555-5555 (figured it wasn't ok for me to call or txt after my last bday)

Why? When?

A lot of stuff on my mind, just trying to make things better between us or at. least not so awkward; and whenever you are free.

There is nothing between us, there's nothing to fix. I just feel like this is going to dig up something that took a long time for me let go of. We've hashed this out over and over and over there's nothing for me to say that I haven't already said. I'm sorry if that's what you want to hear. Just don't know why this even matters now after what 2 or 3 years. I'm only doing this for you. Let me when and I'll see what I can do, you should still remember when I'm free
I should have only done this for me. Guilt is a horrible thing when it comes to these types of situations. I never want to be put in a position where I find myself doing things out of guilt.

I'm not sure how to explain it, but I still want you in my life. Hurting you has never been and never is my expectation. The way I went about the way I felt for you then and my avoidance of a relationship with you was wrong and dumb. So yea I do still have feelings for you, I don't why I just do, but look I'll be honest it probably will bring up things you let go of. So if you can't trust me I understand. And you'd think I know by now, but I have to ask bluntly. Not wanting it to feel like you took a step backwards, so if you want it to be like Alst just let it go, tell me. What I want is selfish, not trying to jump back just make appropriate steps forward, and letting you go is apparently harder than I thought. 

As you already know this didn't workout at all how I thought or maybe it did. I think I always knew I meant nothing to you or less than what I imagined.
Yea I said it.
In reality like in actual life you just ran game
First and last dude to ever made my cry over and over and over and over again

Maybe it's the Gemini in you that makes you such and unstable person
Nah you are your own person that astrology crap is BS
Maybe maybe you are scared
Like deathly afraid of what could happen whether it be positive or negative
Or maybe you just don't see what I saw

I hope you got what you wanted
The taste of me
The curiosity of being with me in limbo again
The satisfaction of knowing for sure you could do it again you know like a game of sorts
Maybe the reality of what I wanted collided with what you wanted 

I think this is what you do you pull women in running game and shit but you always forget to that life is a revolving door and it will come back and haunt you like the ghost of women past
Maybe men this young do not think far enough ahead not to hurt you but only think of themselves and their own pain

They call you G (Giant) because you run game

Karma can server you better than I can
Yes she can but I will not be their to see it. I will be enjoying my life and hoping you do the same. I pray nothing but the best happens for you, to you and around you.

"Feeling no remorse, feeling like my hands were forced"
Never thought I'd be singing Jay-Z
You eventually buy his album too and "Part II" makes you believe in love again like Beyonce's album that you also purchased

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Ask me anything

Emily King writes the story of my life

"I still wish things were good just like they used to be;
two friends who fell in love trapped in the mystery;
we had so much in common and we laughed at everything;
that was long ago before you went and changed;
before we lost control before we started to fight;
before you raised your voice before I left that night;
and now I'm left here crying out head up to the sky;
trying to get back to the point when we were right;
you keep pulling me DOWN" - Emily King.

Thank you for writing the story of my love life way back when. I discovered Emily years ago so I figured I should finally share her with others. She's a beautiful for woman with a beautiful collection of songs. Please run and check her out