Thinking While Sick

Well I love my life right now
I mean deeply head over heels about life and work
Oh yeah and none other than baby Jesus (you choose your own Jesus)

My bro and sis-in-law are about to have twins
Yep two people barely making it in this world are about to have to more babies
Dumb, dumb, dumb (my opinion)

Love life
_______________(flatlined)
I'm not too much worried about it anymore
I think I am trying to get comfortable with me and who I am etc.

My work is awesome
Haute MEN all around
I think they may be married but that ain't gonna stop me from looking
Everyone is cool there too
More Money for the man upstairs and for me
*Hell Yeah*

Friends I guess they are doing fine from what they tell me

My lil sister crazy as ever
Her storyline has been a roller coaster ride
She got on it willingly and signed a wavier with big ass print
But I can't shade her on looking for love but she gotta get out them dang dark corners
*The Freaks Come Out At Night*

My car is in the shop someone who I live with can't drive and hit my parked car
Did I mention she said absolute nothing for a least 6 hours from wince it happen WOWzers
Boy If it had been me ...
Anywho they still can't fix it right so I have a rental car till then

Halloween was a blast
Look up Q100 Big Wicked and you'll see photos from the party it was awesome

Holidays are coming up
So I decided I wanted to go to my cousins house instead of diving the TN (For the win)
I hope it's chill and super lush because I'll be festive on the inside

HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH NOTHING
I don't people who look down on me for not completing school. It's not like they were gonna pay for it, help me support myself while going, or even honest. So to all those people shut your mouth because I'll be great with and without a degree believe or not

P.S. So yeah the ex from last post. As you may have already guessed he reach out. UGH
Is it really that difficult to just keep going through life without a flame brusting up from the ground ever couple of years? If not can people really be honest with themselves and with the other person as to why they care so freak much even after you literally moved on?

RANT
If you move/moved on stop reaching back here in the past for something. Make clear what do you want from me. You genuinely could not care less if I burst into flames right now, exited stage left, and was beemed up to baby Jesus all in one fell swoop. Asking me stupid questions like how am I, what have you been up or even how's life don't seem like common courtesy but what it does seem like is fishing....I HATE FISHING LITERALLY AND FIGURATIVELY. It's boring with no certainty and if I want uncertainty I'll keep living because there is enough of it out here that I don't need more. I'd rather been treated like a regular person...no no no...a stranger and received a hello and left it at that. No punctuality, no courtesy, no fishing just a simple hello and if you don't wanna do that you don't have to, Seriously.
You gave her what I wanted all those years for ((yep a bitch is jealous not envious/hating just jealous)). Yep I am only mad at me for wasting much time, making up excuses for you (which weren't necessary), and leaving myself wide freaking open (dumb as hell). You help me put on my big girl pants, so Thank You.

Ok I'm done

So It's No Swear November for me

*Update* Random I'm back

OK I'm back now ready to keep this going.


I been doing some adjustment in my life.
I'm 20 now and have decide that I need to make me happy
If not then who *hmm*
No matter what mess I make on the way it's my mess


Well I have started to cut a few more people out of my life
*snip* *snip*
They aren't clearly dragging me down
But they are messing with my mind
Can't have that


I have one new additions in my life
You know the usual
Boys
Hoes
Clothes
*HUH*



I final got my payment after 2 years
MEMO: DON'T LOAN MONEY TO NO ONE WITHOUT THEM SIGNING SOMETHING



I feel like I'm on the right road
FINALLY



Now I just need to keep my promise

Giving up on Dating

I was having a conversation with a guy friend of mine one facebook. He and I discuss all the random ish that happens in my head. This day we were discussing why in my 20s I feel like I want to give up on dating PERIOD!! and why men can't have a real conversation with a woman. So here is the conversation:

Princess

Today at 11:21am

Not sure but I am sure something is wrong with me. I think I may become just another one of those people who can't bond properly with others.

MD

Today at 11:40am

NO I DONT THINK SO....LOOK AT US....YOUR A VERY NICE PERSON TO TALK TO......I TOLD YOU BEFORE I WANTED TO GET TO KNOW YOU A LITTLE BETTER BUT IM NOT GONNA FORCE YOU TO DO ANY THING YOU DONT WANT TO DO......AND IF YOU CAN TALK TO ME AND I KNOW IM DIFFICULT...LOL

Princess

Today at 11:57am

I don't mean like that but a personal relationship with people. I realize that I speak to and we have these conversations but I never have to face you at least not unwillingly. What I mean to say is when I meet people I smile and laugh and completely look like we are having a great time but yet on the inside I am scream at them to shut up because I don't care what they have to say. I also mean to say that when I have had to cut people off from my life the same since of caring or really the lack of there of resurfaces as if were never gone. I also mean that I just don't think that I can form an actual interest into a person without think this person has no idea how dumb they sound while I shake my head in agreement or disagreement with them.

I know this is a lot but if you get confused somewhere let me know.

MD

Today at 12:37pm

SO BASICALLY YOU NEED MORE THAN THE AVERAGE IDIOT OUT THERE.....LOL....YOU NEED SOMEONE YOU CAN RELATE WITH IN EVERY ASPECT OF YOUR LIFE.....THING IS YOU ATTRACT THE ONES WHO COMES UP....AYE SHAWTY....RATHER THAN HOW ARE YOU DOING MISS

Princess

Today at 12:59pm

I don't give the type of guy that would even call me shawty (very disrespectful and meaningless word) the time of day, but even when I speak back to a guy calls me miss or beauty or any other words used for flattery I still have that felling that I know that this also is just as shallow. I mean I am only 20 years old and I feel like no one (totally exaggerating) can have a real conversation like my political views, or what I wanna do and why, or how come you think like that. I mean talk to me like a person not like I am dense or I can't think on my own or I have no opinion at my age, or even like I am only interested in things that will land them and me in a bed together. Which leads me to think I don't even wanna be with you like that when you can't even hold a conversation. I find this occurs in people in there teens all the way up to their late 20 early thirties and that still depends on when they think this is a good time for them to grow up in their mind. I am 20 and I just don't think it is natural for me to feel like I am ready to just stop dating period

MD

Today at 1:15pm

wow thats serious.....but then again thats how most people act to me also....but im a person who acts childish myself when i can....now for all the time have we spoken and being honest now....what do you think?

Princess

Today at 1:18pm

You are cool people and have being willing to listen to me rant

MD

Today at 1:20pm

well thats my thing...i love hearing people talk/rant whatever you want to call it.....something to talk about......its like im always the one finding something to talk about no matter who i talk to....i'm not saying we should be talking about the periodic table but atleast have something better to talk about than that new beyonce CD

Princess

Today at 1:23pm

right there are more things that matter in life than just the pop culture BS and over publicized events

Well we went on and on about this for a while but this is basically the meat and bones of the situation. Have you ever felt like "If I never have to go out with another dude I would be ok with that". Is this a part of life and growing up or and I just screwed up in the head like that.

SO OVER THEM ALL

My dating life sucks

The one you want is the one you can have

But the one(s) you can have you don't want

Even if you do want them it only a momentary fix

Definitely a rida if I like ya



"Can't believe what you have done to me" - Mya (No Touching)

In most cases/situations I take what I want

I have only been ready to jump twice

Once I actually did it and no body caught me

I ran like the wind after that

And ever since but now I am tired

I hate the saying this quote "The grass looks greener on the other side"

No it is greener I have been over there

I think I am narcissistic but I am ok with that

Maybe not

Men are not all dogs

Some look like other animal Prefect example



When does the cool chick get what she wants

I am soooooooooo young it's scary to think on day I will alone

O hell no

Someone wanna be my roommate PLEASE!

How does a guy say "Ain't nothing wrong with me"

But follow it with "I ain't perfect"

Well don't they cancel out HMMM

Maybe I am too picky

Nope I want what I got or better

A car, two spots, a job, higher education

Definitely not too much

It never really phases me to be without a "MAN"

Because they are never around long

I have one Man in my life

My pops

Definitely not over him

He is where my standards come from